I Grew Up Brown County

Super Bowl Party!

*Betty’s parents are letting her throw a Super Bowl Party! So far to me, the Super Bowl just means Dad hogs the tv all day, and every now and then a cute commercial comes on. But today is the real thing.

When I get to Betty’s house, Juniors and Seniors and even a few kids who have already graduated are piled on couches in her living room. Dips. Salsas. Chips. Cookies. Cheeses. Sodas. Her dining room table is piled high with all the goods.

Two –day-old snow lingers on the frozen ground, but Betty’s parents have a hot tub outside the back porch. I forgot a swimsuit. I borrow one of her mom’s, and gratefully slide into the hot, steamy water. I have zero interest in football. If it weren’t for Junior High Cheerleading and some Color Guard / Marching Band halftime action, I doubt I would have ever seen a game. Feeling no compunction to break my non-viewing streak, I am content watching hazy wisps of steam rise from the surface of the scalding water and into the icy branches above us. This is how you spend a football game.

The hot tub lives up to its name. It makes the surrounding winter air feel even chillier. Stepping out of the warm, frothy bubbles to grab snacks or to use the restroom is torture. It is on one of these treacherous excursions that I barely miss the infamous “wardrobe malfunction” of 2004. As I walk into the living room, I hear boys hooting and hollering and high-fiving.

“What’s going on? Did we win?” I ask.

“No! Janet Jackson just showed her nipple on national television!”
More hooting. More hollering. Even more high-fiving.

These are the future leaders of our community, of our country. Pride and joy.

So back to the hot tub I go. A few of us spend most of the game out there, while others come and go. After a while, we notice two of our classmates are staring rather dreamily into one another eyes. *Steve keeps going under water.

At the school the next day, we learn that “Snorkeling Steve” (as he comes to be known) was into some shenanigans under the water in that hot tub that day. Risky business. We tease the two of them mercilessly. Betty’s Super Bowl Party goes down in BC history as a smashing success.

*Names have been changed to protect the innocent… and the not-so-innocent.